Mike's Hard Cranberry Lemonade

Whomever came up with the idea to market "premium malt beverages" (essentially, wine coolers) catering to the "extreme" sensibility was a real genius. There is simply no social stigma attached to drinking a Mike's Hard Lemonade. They're light and delicious like a wine cooler, but they don't make you feel like the lame-ass pantywaist sitting there drinking a wine cooler.

I prefer the Cranberry version, 'cause it's just like a bottle of Ocean Spray, except it gives you a nice buzz. These are especially good on a Saturday afternoon, or if you're at one of those stupid barbecue-type get-togethers you feel compelled to attend because otherwise your co-workers will ostracize you. Problem is, Mike's Cranberry is so delicious that I inevitably have too many of them, and full-on drunkenness sneaks up on me quite without warning. Last summer I had about 18 of them in a row and ended up barfing on our administrative assistant's new boobs.

Loud Bassoon rating scale

Review by Dr. Delicious