Snapple Elements – Earth

The second Snapple Elements drink I've tried is precisely 62% more thirst-quenching than Snapple Sun. Earth is the drink for "balance," with ginseng, bee pollen, and grapeseed extract. It also contains, and largely tastes like, grape and cranberry. Not nearly as corn-syrupy as Sun, either.

Nice crisp flavor, a bit startling at first (not sure if you like it, then suddenly you do), but goes down easy like a Texas whore. An aftertaste that is sweet and not bitter. Doesn't actually taste like dirt, either, unlike a Texas whore.

As for its physiological effects, I can't say I have more balance. In fact, since drinking Earth, I've fallen down three flights of stairs, tripped over a couch, and landed face-first into a birthday cake.

Then again, I am the world's greatest stuntman. I can say, however, that thanks to the bee pollen I can now build complex structures based on simple hexagons and give accurate directions by shaking my ass.

Review by Crimedog