Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory (1971)
Directed by Mel Stuart
Written by David Seltzer

Candy-maker Willy Wonka devises an elaborate scheme to lure children to his heavily-guarded fantasyland, where one by one he humiliates and/or mutilates them until only one remains; he proclaims his love for the last young boy and invites him to move in.

Well, that's one interpretation, but bear in mind, I'm still doing extensive psychoanalysis stemming from my three-week stay at Neverland Ranch back in 1991. No matter how you slice it, however, Willy Wonka is a real odd bird, not quite a kids' movie, yet not quite a satire for adults either. In fact, its main goal seems to be simply to berate its audience for being too fat, greedy, and stupid to live.

Which is true enough. This film is surely unforgettable, though not always for good reasons. Several dated pseudo-acid-trip montages keep bringing things into stranger and stranger terrain just when the story begins to show some semblance of sense, the songs are more obnoxious than lovable, and Gene Wilder's enigmatic timing seems either the result of pure brilliance or total apathy.

Some of the images I remembered most from childhood viewings of the film turn out not to be all that "classic" when you look at it today … the wondrous chocolate factory, for example, looks like a rather cheaply-decorated stage warehouse (which I'm sure is what it was). The pervading tone of outright malice doesn't make it all that "magical" to sit through, and the sudden happy ending makes no sense at all.

On the other hand, you have some hilariously bratty and cartoonishly gluttonous kids, several ingenious inventions, and some great, weird visual gags. So, overall, a split decision. Willy Wonka is classic, sure … but so were those Shirley Temple movies, and given 30 more years, Wonka will hold up about as well.

Review by Seamus O'Mommyhole