Unreleased Celebrity Albums

The time comes for most celebrities when they want to branch out and explore their musical side.
Sometimes, a Jack Wagner or a Pele finds success, but more frequently, the result is a catastrophe of Shatneresque proportions.
Here is a look at some celebrity albums still languishing in the vaults.

Good Grammer    You Should Be Danson    Olmos Paradise

Kelsey Grammer - "Good Grammer"
Despite the presence of an extended eleven-minute jazz workout of the popular "Frasier" theme, the 1998 Good Grammer album is marred by too many spoken interludes and sentimental ballads. A couple of standout tracks include covers of Nico ("Kelsey Girls") and the Clash ("I Don't Want to Go Back to Kelsey").

   

Ted Danson - "You Should Be Danson"
Danson's 2001 effort attempted to capitalize on the success of "Becker," but A&R executives weren't interested. Lionel Richie's production does suit Danson's style, however, cuts like "Danson on the Ceiling" and "Danson in the Dark" were a bit too on the nose.

   

Edward James Olmos - "Olmos Paradise"
We have to respect this actor's desire to bring meringue music to a wider audience, but frankly, these new arrangements did not suit songs like "Didn't We Olmos Have it All" and the title track.


Blue Jean    I'm the Most    It's a Fishel!

Jean Stapleton - "Blue Jean"
This was to be a reissue of Ms. Stapleton's much-rumored 1971 piano trio session, recorded at the height of her "All in the Family" popularity. Her shrill voice does not do justice to standards like "Sixteen (Staple) Tons."

   

Donny Most - "I'm the Most"
The former Ralph Malph made an ill-conceived comeback stab with this preposterous 1996 session, featuring covers of Bob Dylan's "Most of the Time" and the frankly bizarre take on Prince's "U Got the Most."

   

Danielle Fishel - "It's a Fishel!"
When "Boy Meets World" ended, starlet Danielle Fishel made this record aimed at the teen pop market. Perhaps the worst track on here is the Marvellettes cover "Too Many Fishel in the Sea."


Fields of Joy    Cerebral Pauly    Cruise Control

Kim Fields with Lenny Kravitz - "Fields of Joy"
Few Lenny Kravitz fans realize that he produced this aborted 1995 release from "Living Single" star Kim Fields. Although a surprisingly effective rock version of Sting's "Fields of Gold" leads things off, it goes steadily downward with a pointless remake of Big Country's "Fields of Fire."

   

Pauly Shore - "Cerebral Pauly"
Desperate to revitalize his image, Pauly "Weasel" Shore made this spoken-word album that included all of his views on current events and philosophy. It was not an album needed by the world.

   

Tom Cruise - "Cruise Control"
Tom Cruise's Hi-NRG tie-in with the film "Days of Thunder" was marred by substandard songwriting and instantly dated production values. The only interesting tracks were covers of "Sea Cruise" and Dylan's "Just Like Tom Cruise's Blues."


Macchio Man    Walken on Sunshine    Walken in Memphis

Ralph Macchio - "Macchio Man"
Ralph Macchio's brief resurgence with "My Cousin Vinny" inspired this failed attempt to strike while the iron was semi-hot. The bombastic title track seemed intended for Miami nightclubs, but wouldn't even make sense at a Ralph Macchio-themed wedding reception.

   

Christopher Walken - "Walken on Sunshine"
His experience as a song-and-dance man had expectations high for this album, but unfortunately Christopher Walken's first effort sank under the weight of smug inclusions like "Walken After Midnight."

   

Christopher Walken - "Walken in Memphis"
Surprisingly, even though Walken on Sunshine bombed out, the artist chose to take his act on the road, recording the live album Walken in Memphis. It's bad, though it features a pretty good version of "Walken, Don't Run."


More Unreleased Celebrity Albums
Even More Unreleased Celebrity Albums
Unreleased Celebrity Albums IV