Milky Way Lite

What's with the goddamn Bullwinkle? Oh, I see, it's a special promotion. I was beginning to think that Mars, Inc. had adopted Bullwinkle as its mascot, to which I say, fuck Bullwinkle. Cartoons are out, fashion is in. Get with it.

Milky Way Lite is a lower-fat alternative to the old standby, offering the same pleasureful caramel/nougat/chocolate blend, with about half the fat and significantly fewer calories. It's close enough to the real thing to make Milky Way itself a choice only for those people who insist "Diet stuff never tastes as good." Yeah, good for you. Enjoy the extra 50 pounds you carry around on your ass, El Gordo Supremo.

My main problem with all the Milky Way products is that they're pretty generic tasting, and make me uncomfortably thirsty.

Review by Dora Donatello