 Palmer® Solid Milk Chocolate Coins of All Nations
Oh, sweet Jesus, what was I thinking? I just ate thousands of dollars worth of gold coins from Italy, Spain, the United States, and the Netherlands! I'm such a fucking idiot! Now I'll have to wait for them to pass in my stool so I can retrieve them from the smeary shit and spend them! Oh, wait … whew, no, these were chocolate gold coins, not real gold coins. Thank God. It's way too embarrassing trying to spend a sweaty, shitty gold coin. As candy, gold coin chocolates are odd, ranking up with candy cigarettes and bubblegum tape dispensers for pure "huh?" value. But there is some appeal to tearing open the little mesh scrotum that contains the booty, and then peeling back the foil of each coin to reveal the chocolate, imprinted with the coin molding. Too bad the chocolate itself is not good. Oh well, at least I don't have to wade through twenty gallons of my own waste to reclaim them once I've eaten them. If only I could say the same thing for that full, unbroken roll of real quarters I just ate. OUCH, that's gonna hurt like a motherfucker coming out the tail end! Review by Deep Dickens |
