Haysi Fantayzee
Battle Hymns for Children Singing (Razor & Tie 79301822182)

This is an album I was so absolutely sure I would never see reissued on CD that I was starting to seriously think about trying to release it myself. Though I've always bought tons of albums, there are very few albums from the early 80s that I actually listened to a lot back in the day. I tended to be a "Side 1" listener or a "listen to the single and maybe a couple other tracks" listener, a situation no doubt encouraged by the tremendous amount of filler on albums from that era.

But Battle Hymns For Children Singing was consistently in heavy rotation on my Sears turntable, and has always been a great favorite. That's been kinda frustrating, too, since most of my dumb American friends didn't even believe the album or group existed. I'd get into one of those aimless self-congratulatory "remember 80s pop culture" conversations, and I'd always clear the room with "Oh, yeah, and remember the video for 'John Wayne is Big Leggy' by Haysi Fantayzee? Ha, MV-50 used to play that one a LOT!" Many blank stares ensued, followed by, "Oh, hey, well, thanks for the cocaine, we got to go now."

Many thanks to Razor & Tie for proving I was not insane (though now I face the task of proving that MV-50, the local video music channel, existed). Battle Hymns is a goofball masterpiece that I can listen to time and again. The CD reissue has been done PERFECTLY, containing the album in its entirety, with artwork faithfully preserved in a beautiful brilliant box, and SIX bonus tracks added that must represent Haysi's complete output. I must admit, I probably waited for two or three years after this album came out in 1983 before I gave up on a follow-up release ever coming out.

The band was not around long, and in America, even less than that, but it's a shame that they get lumped together with all the one-hit and no-hit wonders that proliferated in the early 80s. Jeremy Healy and Kate Garner were the singers, clad in junky postapocalyptic zoot wear that Boy George swears (probably correctly) that they swiped from his post-punk/pre-Culture Club look. Paul Caplin was the arranger and programmer, crafting a sound as kitchen-sink as the band's image.

Take the chunky zing of Dexy's Midnight Runners and toss in the dub fixation of The Clash at their most irrelevant, the Brit humour of Madness, and the attention-grabbing stage presence of a very in-your-face vaudeville act and you start approaching the majestic left-field lunacy of Haysi Fantazyzee. Violins mate with the occasional spoon solo, two-measure hard rock guitar solos appear out of nowhere, saxophones swirl around heavily delayed drum machines, twangy guitars ring out as mock-Native American background vocals send smoke signals directly to your ears. Atop this baffling soup are Garner's pretty Kate Bush-meets-Cyndi Lauper vocals and Healy's unhinged madman style, which I can't compare to anything except to say that it sounds like his main aim was to make the other people in the studio laugh.

It's riotous music, and moreover, amazingly catchy, bright pop. "Shiny Shiny" and "John Wayne is Big Leggy" were the big singles, both of them songs I can (and frequently do) listen to ten times in a row – I use every chance I can get to pop these onto a mix tape and spread the word. Usually resulting in more blank stares followed by "Uh, thanks for the tape, I used it to make a copy of the new Travis album for my car."

Beyond the singles are album tracks of equal merit. "I Lost My Dodi" is a loony bit of faux calypso you'd almost expect from the Mekons, and what's more, it helps us all get through our grief over losing Dodi al-Fayed in that fatal car crash. 🤷 "More Money" is a socialist rallying cry that gives the album some substance (though I am not one of those people who generally considers "socially conscious" to be a necessarily good thing) – more importantly, it's just a great song. "Jimmy Jive Jive" and "Shoofly Love" continue the "reggae island on Jupiter" approach: jump-roping songs for the interplanetary set.

"Sabres of Paradise" and "Chizoola" are long, atmospheric dub excursions that color the album with some different textures (and get it away from being 100% frenetic straight through), adding some sexiness to the mix. "Sister Friction" (the third single) and "Here Comes the Beast" are, now as then, my less favorites on the album, but they're still so unique I wouldn't call 'em bad by any means. If anything, they're just the most typically "80s album track" sounding.

The bonus tracks push the running time up to a very generous 72 minutes, which might be a pukey stomach-stuffing helping of Haysi for most people, but are a glorious Thanksgiving tofu feast for me. "Holy Joe" was a pre-Battle Hymns single, pretty catchy robo-rockabilly, and its b-side "Okay Big Daddy" is an almost offensive bit of fake worldbeat constructed from backwards tracks. Fortunately it's short, and I guess any Haysi is good Haysi in my book. Five remixes are included: an extended version of "John Wayne" (wonderful), a 12" mix of "Holy Joe" (welcome), two remakes of "Shiny Shiny" (awesome), and a 12" "Sister Friction" (better than the album version, actually).

For me, this is a dream CD. There's very few of my fave albums that have yet to make the digital crossover, and with Battle Hymns on CD right in front of me, I feel quite satisfied and grateful. Whoever was the crackpot that got this released, good job and many thanks! Justice done to a very neglected, very good thing.

Loud Bassoon rating scale

Review by Luis Mèlmán