Phantasy Star Online Episode III: C.A.R.D. Revolution for Nintendo GameCube
Developed by Sonic Team
Published by Sega

Just when you think Sonic Team has gone off the deep end, they find another ledge and just plunge right over. God bless them for their extant body of work, which is a hall of fame in its own right: Samba de Amigo, Chu Chu Rocket, and Sonic the Hedgehog, among others. The original PSO (Episodes I and II) was and still is their magnum opus, created from a concept, and unique aesthetic, that could carry on for many more sequels. But just as you might expect Sonic Team to do, they announce they're ending the series, but not with another online role-playing game; this time it is an online card-playing game. That's right, cards.

Forget the fact that any previous Phantasy Star installment was an RPG. Fans were hoping PSO would be the next-generation update they've been waiting years for. It turned out not to be that at all, but something quite different, and possibly better. Since PSO Episode II was just more of the same as Episode I, logic would dictate that III would follow suit.

But cards? They might as well have made PSO Kart Racing, though I'm not putting that past them as a possibility. If you can't imagine what kind of inanity is in for you by the title alone, just play the game, and soon you'll be deeply immersed in the lysergic nightmare that is C.A.R.D. Revolution.

I mean that in a good way, however. The key to understanding PSO3 is abandoning all reason and expectation. This is not PSO as you know it. This is not a rip-off of Yu-Gi-Oh! or Magic: The Gathering. You have not played a game like this before.

As in the previous PSO, you create a character, but that's where the similarity ends. Your character here has no bearing on the game at all, as it is merely an instrument to talk to other characters, get quests, and deploy cards out into battle.

You see, the entire game takes place on a tiny portion of the spaceship you know from the original PSO. You have a deck of cards, representing weapons, story characters, battle actions, and creatures. You'll get a quest from someone, at which point you transport your cards down to some location on the planet, where the story character materializes to confront the enemy. From there it is a turn-based tactical engagement on a grid, where you must strategically play the cards from your deck to attack the enemy and save your own skin.

At first this sounds incredibly retarded, but once you get a grasp of the combat mechanics and the nuances of assembling a capable deck, the game grows on you. Depending on how well you perform in battle, you will be rewarded with a number of cards, some of which will be brand-new, and even rare. The drive to collect all 500-odd cards in the game is compelling, though daunting.

You can also take your deck online and play with whatever other goons around the world who conned themselves into buying this game.

Gameplay aside, the most intriguing element to me is the absurd universe Sonic Team has created, where any sense is thrown into the airlock and jettisoned out into orbit. A man boldly proclaims upon meeting you that his favorite things in life are toys and cider; the bad guys in the game are called Arkz; the monsters range from beasts called Rag Rappies, to the powerful De Rol Le. Well, I'm not sure De Rol Le is in this episode, but suffice it to say that the bizarre world of PSO is certainly back in full force.

As much as I enjoy this game, I don't see an overriding point to it, and hence I can't rightly recommend it to anyone except those who already love PSO. And even then it's a gamble. Maybe I don't like this game so much for its content, but its mere existence. It's rare to see someone green-light such a trainwreck of a concept and actually pull it off with aplomb.

Loud Bassoon rating scale

Review by Bock Lee Temjin