Ben & Jerry's® Concession Obsession
I think "my" Ben & Jerry's era is past, having peaked in the early 90s and long since hobbled along obligatorily, much like my interest in Paul McCartney, David Lynch, and showering. I am always curious when Ben & Jerry's puts out a new flavor, but it doesn't pack the same punch that it once did. Even so, I will probably always follow the brand at least casually, but it will always be with the understanding that the golden age is behind me. As with Mad Magazine, which I followed from about 1979 to about 1986 and therefore declare that era (with admitted subjectivity) "the golden age," my golden age of Ben & Jerry's is a thing of nostalgia by now.
So upon seeing a new flavor, I felt the call of duty to try it out. I get burned on this kind of behavior all the time (I can't tell you the number of Paul McCartney albums I have bought and subsequently regretted, all owing to some misguided feeling of loyalty). I figured, though, that even at worst, a Ben & Jerry's flavor is always worthwhile.
Concession Obsession is, even for Ben & Jerry's, a bit much. At 1240 calories a pint and 76 grams of fat, this is truly one of the most pointlessly damaging things you can subject your body to. The taste is delicious, of course, but nowhere near the misty realms of glorious abandon you will find in a pint of, for example, Chubby Hubby. That one actually seems worth the fat. This one just seems like a pint of pure guilt, with incommensurate glory.
It's vanilla ice cream with nonpareils (i.e. Sno*Caps), chocolate crisped rice candy (i.e. Nestlé Crunch), and fudge covered peanuts, all blended together with a very rich swirl of caramel. "Yikes!" screams your flabby body. "That's not doing us any good." I think that the ratio of candy needs to be addressed, too: it's about 1:2:6 for nonpareils, chocolate crisped rice, and fudge covered peanuts. That's too many peanuts, not enough of the other two. That said, it's madness to suggest that this isn't a tasty experience. It's just not that worth it, sort of like an ugly friction dancer or a dreary movie you suffer through simply to see William Hurt's bare ass. Is there such a movie, by the way? Please email me with details.
Review by Rick Puce |