Tecate

If Corona seems a bit too "Parrothead" for you, but Negra Modelo is a bit too scary, consider Tecate, perhaps the most authentic of imported Mexican beers. Full-bodied, sweet, crisp, and delicious, it's just an all-around good beer.

I prefer it in a can, out of some vague sense of it being "better" that way, but it's actually probably best enjoyed from the bottle, unlike breastmilk, which is best slurped right from the source.

Now, if the legends are true about Mexican virgins dispensing Tecate from their voluptuous breasts, then that's by far the preferred way to go. Sadly, these so-called "legends" were only invented just now, by me, on my fourth Tecate.

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Review by The Lazy Mexican