Delinquent Juvenilia I: Eric Haugen vs. The Whiz Kids
Burping, more urination humor, a Kaopectate reference … yeccch.
Hortense: Computers can be a valuable resource. They can help you spell dirty words.
Hortense: BURP!
Mrs. Buttface: How come this room is 3 different colors? By the way, Hortense, you must cut down on the beer!
Computers in Home-Ec …
Hortense: It's fun to make toast in the disk drive!
Hortense (looking at computer screen displaying dog urinating on fire hydrant): Computers have good graphics.
Hortense (looking at screen displaying "Enter date please"): Computers like it when you shove fresh fruit into them, such as dates.
Hortense (looking at screen displaying "You are very ugly. You are very stupid. Ha Ha Ha Ha"): Computers can insult you and enjoy it!
Hortense (looking at screen displaying illegible directory): Sometimes they print something totally unreadable. Put Kaopectate in it. That'll help.
Hortense: Mrs. Buttface, you need a shave. This razor blade should do it.
Boy: Why is my hair blue?
Mrs. Buttface: Will you stop asking that?