 Rally's
As a bachelor and ergo fast-food junkie who lives in the area, I find the Rally's on the corner of Vandeventer and Lindell in St. Louis just too convenient to pass up. The tasty seasoned curly fries, the juicy burgers, the large-ass cold coke … mmmmmmmm … are at a different Rally's.
My first mishap here was on the 4th of July. I'd give them the benefit of the doubt it being a holiday, if they knew it was a holiday. But they couldn't have known it was a holiday … since they couldn't seem to figure out how to work a freakin' register with pictures of food on it.
When you hear "Rally," it's usually related to a word like "race" or another speed-related event. But speed is exactly what's lacking here … they couldn't even beat the old Domino's "30 minute guarantee." Nothing better than waiting a very long time for incredibly substandard food. Freshness? Heat? I could have taken it home and cooked it on the George Foreman Grill and it still would have been cold. Sally Struthers couldn't get a degree for these burgers! Er, I'm out of lame pop-culture references. And don't think about condiments. These "workers" seem to have thought I was asking for Trojans. And usually "fries" implies that they've been put in hot oil. I've seen more oily heat at the nudie bar on wrestling nights. And the soda was a Coke like RuPaul's a woman. NOTHING there was anywhere close to representing food. If I had a dog, it would have eaten its leg off before eating this food. Hm, maybe I'd do that anyway.
Repeat performances were no better. I must enjoy being abused while paying for bad food. So I've learned. Yet still, I go back, simply because it's close. This is one of the worst fast food places man has ever created.
I suppse I should try to say something positive … uh, well, nice concrete curbs?
Review by Mo' Rice, February 1999 |
